I initially chose to attend this retreat for reciting the Buddha’s name because it was held during the summer and was the first Amitabha Recitation retreat held at DDRC. I thought it would be a good experience for me to go. The first two to three days of the retreat for me were very difficult because I needed to adjust from the vastly different outside world to the retreat environment. In our usual lives, we are accustomed to the constant use of electronics, along with communicating with others, and a hectic daily schedule. In contrast, the retreat was nearly the exact opposite, which can lead to initial disorentiation and a feeling of unfamiliarity. In addition to this, I slept very poorly the first two nights, with only about two hours of sleep on each night. The end result was that by the third day, I felt very tired, and had a headache along with mild dizziness. In fact, I even overslept one time in the evening after the medicine meal by an hour. However, after the initial start to the retreat had passed, I found myself growing more familiar with the retreat’s schedule and the environment around me, and I was also able to sleep more at night. Therefore, I was able to be more focused on chanting the Buddha’s name during the day. Unlike the first two days, the remainder of the retreat went smoothly and time seemed to pass very quickly.

We watched recorded video lectures by Master Sheng Yen in the morning sessions. Even though it has already been ten years since he has passed away, the videos were very informative and helpful. While we tend to not think too often about dying, death is something everybody must eventually face. One of Master Sheng Yen’s lectures described in detail what the process of dying is like. The human body is composed of four elements: earth, water, fire, and air. When one is dying, these four elements will disintegrate. As earth disintegrates, a person will feel like a heavy mountain is pressing on their body. As water disintegrates, a person will feel extremely thirsty, but at this point they are unable to drink any water. As fire disintegrates, a person will feel very hot at first, like they are at the entrance of a volcano, and then suddenly very cold. As air disintegrates, the person will feel like they need to inhale air, but will be unable to do so, and will continue to slowly exhale. Master Sheng Yen said that once we know what dying is like, we should not be afraid. Just face it, accept it, deal with it, and let go of it.

When we die, everyone must face these difficult conditions. If we don’t practice the method of reciting the Buddha’s name in our daily lives, we will not be able to recite the Buddha’s name when dying. We also need to remember to vow to go to Amitabha Pure Land, otherwise we will not be able to go upon death. Therefore, it is important to attend retreats and practice.